We all know people who appear to breeze through life, happily moving from one triumph to the next. On the other hand, we know others who never quite make it, and always have an answer why life has dealt them a hard blow. Society is made up of victors and victims, and the difference can very often be boiled down to one key factor – attitude.

When you move in a new career direction, it’s vital to learn the habits of victors to gain a successful outcome. The victims pursue their actions in a timid manner, hoping for great things, but never really believing they’re worthy of them. Victors commit mentally to a successful result, and use emotion to back their actions.

Take a couple of tennis players about to play a championship game. One says “It’s my last chance – I’ll give it my best efforts,” but the other one says “Winning is my destiny – it’s everything to me.” No prizes for guessing who’ll win the championship. They might both put in the same amount of time, but the victor spends more of it on his mental training to win.

We can define the victor by the word OAR (Ownership, Accountability and Responsibility) – a figure paddling towards success. The victim is defined by the word BED (Blame, Excuses and Denial) – one who stays in bed and gives up.

The victor doesn’t expect someone else to lead the way – and takes ownership of his or her tasks. He’s liable for his actions, and so takes them seriously (seeing things through by tackling problems not creating them). He takes responsibility for the results of his actions, and doesn’t allow excuses from himself.

The victim can always come up with a reason for not achieving, and it’s rarely to do with himself. Everything is always somebody else’s fault – he doesn’t feel in control so puts the blame at someone else’s door. He gives excuses for his lack of performance, and doesn’t realise the only person he’s convincing is himself. After repeating this pattern of blame and excuses for a while, the victim is in denial, absolutely convinced that there’s nothing he can do about this situation.

Students about to embark on a life-changing training course should give themselves a mental work-out, to prepare for success. Anybody who relates to the victim mentality will have to look at these issues before they start, to take full advantage of the potential in front of them.

The two sets of attitudes are both just habits. With constant repetition over time, habits can be changed. Listen to the little voice in your head – if it’s obviously a victim, then consciously stop it and verbalise why you can achieve. Nobody else is any better than you are – some have just conquered their demons and emerged victorious.

As Churchill said, “There is no such thing as a hero, only those who rise to the occasion.” In learning as in life, we need to have the attitude of a winner in order to become a winner.

(C) 2009. Look at LearningLolly.com for quality ideas on Giving Receiving Feedback and Interview Advice.